Downhill Spiral...

It's been a really eventful week. Kyle had his Blue & Gold Banquet last night for his cub scouts and has earned his bobcat and tiger cub badges. I was presented with two "mom's pins" for Kyle to pin on me and Gene received a certificate of appreciation for support. They even gave Joshua a framed Certificate of participation, which was so cute, since as they were awarding the badges to the tiger cubs, Joshua was up front with us and he kept saying, "Don't forget about me!" The crowd giggled, it was too precious. I was completly unaware that they had a certificate for Joshua and he was so proud of it!

I'm so very proud of my little Tiger Cub!!!

Ok, can't resist....one more photo of Kyle!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Now for the rest of the week....which isn't very good news at all. After returning home from the banquet, Joshua went to bed fully dressed and immediately fell asleep. He awoke at 11PM crying sitting up in his bed. Poor thing had vomitted all over his bed and he was trying to get his dress shirt off but couldn't get the buttons undone. Gene has a VERY weak stomache and could barely gag his way through the clean-up. We'd just gotten Joshua in clean sheets and jammies laying on the couch resting when my mother-in-law called.

I knew it was bad, because it was 12:30 AM. She asked to talk to Gene and needed him there immediately because Bud wouldn't settle down. He was agitated and pacing...or trying to anyway. By the time Gene got there the hospice nurse was there and they had doubled his morphine in an effort to try and calm him down and get him to rest. Gene spent the rest of the night with him, mostly up because Bud just didn't know where he was and was hallucinating. Gene called me from work this morning and told me that he had a rough night with dad. He's not used to seeing him that way and at one point the only thing he could do was to hold him and let him know someone was there that he knew and cared about him. I know this is so hard for him. I feel the end is nearing fast and I'm so unprepared for what will happen next.

I felt it necessary to sit Kyle down and tell him that Papa has cancer and that he is very sick and probably won't get any better. Kyle understood that Papa would go to heaven if he dies and didn't say much other than that. He tends to bottle things and keep them in when they bother him, so I pray that he will be at peace with all that is going on. Kyle has not had a chance to go over to show Papa his Pinewood Derby trophy and the video of his races yet, because he came down sick with the flu early Thursday morning and we wanted to be cautious and keep whatever it is going through the kids away from Bud. Now I'm afraid that Kyle won't get a chance to share that with Bud.

My mother-in-law told me this afternoon that it's too much for one person to care for him at this point and they are looking into getting a hospital bed for the living room to help keep him resting. So Gene, will probably be spending more nights over there and it will make it rough for him physically and emotionally.

Please keep us in your prayers. Pray for wisdom, strength, courage and peace during all of this.

We have a winner......

FINALLY!!! After two cancellations due to bad weather, Kyle's cub scout pack held their Pinewood Derby last night. Kyle was so nervous...in the car on the way to the meet, he was so quiet and withdrawn you woulda thought we were headed to a funeral.

Here's a pic of his car


He had so much fun racing! Here they are at the weigh in....a perfect 5 ounces!

Kyle's car won 10 out of 13 heats and most of the time his car was well ahead of the pack!

Censored Tools by Merkeley Designs
Gene brought his old "winner" from his racing glory days and the pack let them have a "Father/Son" race. Of course, Daddy's car won, though it was a VERY close....almost TOO close to call race!




Kyle took Third Place overall out of 31 cars!!! He was so funny, raising his trophy above his head like a nascar pose! So......that means he gets to advance and race at the BIG council race in March!

And here's the four trophy winners....look at Kyle enjoying the spotlight! LOL!

And finally the Winner's Circle!!! Complete with the parents....please forgive my poor pathetic pic...I'm in desperate need of a haircut/coloring and wasn't expecting to be having my picture taken by any means.


This Friday is the Blue & Gold Banquet....so Amy....we better get cracking on that kit! LOL!

My Heart is breaking....

I'm sitting here in tears as I type this. My father in law is not doing well at all. He is at home now. I took the boys to see him this past Saturday. At first, Joshua was a bit afraid and wouldn't even look at papa. But I told him to show papa the space star he made with the tinkertoys and he took it over. Bud(FIL) was able to open his eyes and admire it. He put his fist out for Joshua to "bump" it....their version of a high five. And Joshua did, then arm wrestled papa with his arm up to his chest. Bud pretended that it was stuck and he pretended to cry (his voice was so raspy that it seemed he really was crying.) I'm so thankful that the boys had this bit of time with their papa.

It was all I could do to keep from crying...I know if the boys weren't their I would have busted out in tears. Bud would have his eyes open...then he'd appear to just fall asleep and his eyes would roll and his toes twitch.

They put him on morphine yesterday for the pain and last Friday he signed a DNR (Do Not Resuscitate) order. Hospice instructed Kathy(MIL) to call them if anything should happen and NOT to call 911 or an ambulance. He won't chew his mint anymore (he was trying to stop the tobacco chew) and he doesn't want coffee anymore.

I think the reality of it all is setting in with me now. Though I knew this day would come, it's still hard. This seems to be all happening way too fast. I'm trying to stay strong for Gene (DH), but it hurts so bad that he won't talk to me and I'm sad too.

We could really use all the prayers you have.

I have music in my heart and wanna share it with you!

This month's scripture was actually chosen two months ago. I used this month's Challenge Kit that you can receive by completing four seperate challenges this month at DigiScrapShak! This Scripture challenge counts towards one of those four required layouts.
You won't wanna miss this kit....it's FABulous!!!:clap

This month's scripture is:
Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord. Ephesians 5:19
Here is the beautiful word art that Carole Neale has prepared for you. Be sure to click the download link [URL="http://www.4shared.com/file/10052463/37e39bf0/CaroleNeale_FebScriptureChallengeWordArt.html"]HERE[/URL] (the picture below is only a preview web size only)
[IMG]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v252/sondie/caroleneale_FebruaryScriptu.jpg[/IMG]

You may use the word art or choose to include the scripture in some form on your layout for the challenge.

And here is my example layout using the Challenge Kit and this month's Scripture Word Art
[IMG]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v252/sondie/Heart-Sing_web.jpg[/IMG]
You can find complete credits [URL="http://www.digiscrapshak.com/photopost/showphoto.php?photo=14055&limit=recent"]HERE[/URL]....and leave me some Love if you wanna....I would really appreciate that! ;)